What would Jesus do?

Do you ever feel that you are subtlety (or not so subtlety) being told what you should do, or things you could change? A few months ago it started for me with wanting to get off all my medications, then working on improving other aspects. Unfortunately though because of my ADHD I could get one little prompting and then my mind adds to it and it turns into 30+ different things I could do better, which quickly gets overwhelming. Then I don’t start anything because it is too much to do.

Twice a year we have a great opportunity to receive guidance from our living prophet, apostles and other church leaders. I was so grateful for this recent General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latterday Saints. For the first time in years we made it a priority to sit and watch all four sessions. I really felt uplifted and inspired by the messages given. The week that followed I pondered what was spoken trying to decipher of all the things they talked about, what could I do? What came to my mind and heart I felt was centered on our family relationships and our home environment.

As many of you know this last year in our life has been one of constant change. Studies have shown for years that children thrive with consistency and routine. I’d have to say that Matt and I do too.

But our life over the last year has been anything but consistent. It started January 1st 2018, We tragically lost a nephew. I had a complicated pregnancy with Andrew.

When he was only 3 weeks old we started a FULL remodel of our Grover Beach home.

At 5 weeks old he developed a perianal absess, eventually at 14 weeks old he had surgery to repair his poor little bottom and it required a LOT from me for his recovery.

We moved out of and back into our home during construction, packed all of our belongings into the back of a Penske truck and moved to a small 3rd floor apartment in the most densely populated new town in Utah. Sold the only home our kids have ever known, and started looking for a new place to plant our roots.

We closed escrow on the zipline house in September and moved into a rental house in Lehi that was close to work and the house.

Unfortunately our idea for finishing the house before we ever moved in didn’t work out. So after two months at the rental we reluctantly moved into our house until we could finalize our construction plans.

I had MANY walk throughs with contractors looking at the house and the plans. We even found all the subs we would need and tried to see if we could save money. That actually proved to be more complicated, time consuming and expensive. We decided to use one of the first general contractors we had met and scheduled a start date. 

So March 4th we moved again, this time into an Airbnb scheduled to stay here until May 5th. We had hoped that would be enough time and we could move back into our home. But as it seems to go with construction it’s going to take a few more weeks than planned. But before  my ADHD gets the best of me here I will go on and I will be happy to explain the schedule of construction on another post . 

I feel this current part, of staying in the Airbnb has been VERY hard on the kids. We have a private area with three bedrooms, one bathroom and a living room area but share the kitchen  and dining space with the owner of the home, Tera. This is where I began feeling strongly that something needed to change. I started to realize just how much everything we have been through has effected us in so many ways. As I pondered all the events of the last year I was filled with a lot of emotions. I was amazed at what we had been through as a family. I know this year has taken a toll on me and I’ve lost my patience more than I care to admit. Sometimes I am so overwhelmed I can barely manage to do the bare necessities. Yet there I was expecting more from my kids than I was even capable of.  They deserved more compassion than I was giving them.  I wanted to do better I pleaded with my Heavenly Father to help me and to teach me how to be a better mom to my kids.

One day shortly after General Conference I was ready I felt so inspired to be more patient and to do things differently. We started the day just like any other: get up, get dressed, eat breakfast, get the kids ready for school. The kids were very normal too they got distracted, messed around  and fought with each other. The older three were finally ready and I sent them down to get in the van and wait for me while I changed Drew’s diaper. A minute later Josh walks in in tears and tells me Steph was unkind to him. I gave him a hug and told him to meet me back in the car but to ignore his sister, we would talk about it on the way to school.  I loaded Drew into his seat and headed out of the driveway asking a few questions about the situation. The thought came to me “teach them about Jesus, to help them want to make better choices”. Then as I started to talk to them about how Jesus wants us to treat others  “WWJD” came flooding to my mind from my childhood. And we spent the entire 25 min car ride discussing what would Jesus do? And how we can use WWJD to help us remember.  I shared real examples from my life, made up kid stories and scriptures. It was by far the best ride to school I have ever had with them. And as we pulled into the drop off line I gave them a challenge to think about WWJD, make the better choice and then tell me about it when I pick them up that afternoon. We gave hugs and they headed off excitedly. Josh immediately told the first friend he saw at school about it.

That. THAT is the type of mom I want to be. Those are the kind of experiences I want to have with them before sending them off into the big bad world. Now I know it’s not realistic to expect everyday to be this but as I ponder What would Jesus do?, I know I can make the better choice and it will help me improve my relationship with my kids and our home environment.